Ellen Degeneres is the greatest because she doesn’t insult anyone but she doesn’t tiptoe around anything either and she includes everyone and she makes people feel good about themselves while poking fun at them and this is the kind of comedy that should be embraced at award shows not misogynistic songs about breasts
Let’s talk about libraries. Libraries! “Oh, hello, are you a person? Great, you’ve met our qualifications. Please enjoy unlimited borrowing of any number of any books. Do we not have the book you seek? Let us know and we will buy it so that you can read it. You will owe us nothing. Stay as long as you want.” Libraries are like pleasant, real-life morphine dreams.
i love how it’s not even a question or concern whether rumple is alive
like it’s just a universal fucking fact that he’s not dead
what if childbirth is just the pain of the 9 periods you missed
and all this time i thought it was the baby ripping through your vagina
one time my sister was working at home depot and got called down to help handle an outrageously angry man returning a lawnmower and it was our dad